How To Build Self Confidence The Easy Way

By Wendy Jones

Have you ever felt anxious, depressed, nervous, or angry? Or feeling low on self confidence and self esteem? One of the questions I get asked a lot by my clients (and friends too) is how to build self confidence and start to feel good about life.
No matter how bad or how low you feel, if you start to use these techniques when you’re feeling low, I know you will start to feel much better and far happier than you ever thought possible. They’ll also show you how to start really achieving your goals and life long dreams at the drop of a hat.

These techniques aren’t my creation - they’re part of a powerful personal development technique known as Neuro Linguistic Programming or NLP for short. The program was created by a Master NLP practitioner who coaches with some of the biggest “blue chip” and Fortune 500 companies around today. The very simple techniques will teach you how to turn a negative and disempowering emotion into a position of strength and power.

Having the knowledge is nothing without action.

You may be familiar with the saying that “knowledge is power” - unfortunately that’s not quite true. You could read everything here, gain the knowledge but still not see any improvements in your life. That’s because “Action is Power”, not knowledge. To reap the benefits of these techniques you must put them into action. It will only take you 10 - 15 minutes a day, but they will likely be the most powerful and stimulating 15 minutes.

Let’s get started with some Magic Hats.

This process you’re about to discover is more commonly known as Magic Hats. You get 5 different colored hats (not real hats - they’re jus in your mind) and 5 very simple steps to follow. In fact there so simple you can have them down in less than 20 minutes.

Step 1 - Self Hypnosis. This is where you place yourself in a very deep state of total relaxation. Just feeling this relaxed is enough to make you feel great, but we are only just getting started.

Step 2. Modalities. Your modalities are your modes of thinking - or how your brain recalls past memories. Have you ever smelt a familiar smell and almost immediately recalled the memory of where you were and what you were doing when you first encountered that smell. Or looked at an old photo and had the memories come flooding back? We remember our past experiences through our senses - just like this.

Step 3. Swish Patterns. This is simply a method where we replace one emotion with another. So if we are experiencing a negative emotion, it’s a method we use to replace it with a positive and happy emotion.

Step 4. Anchors. When you are experiencing your new positive behaviour it’s important to “anchor” it in your memory so that you can recall it whenever you wish - literally at the drop of a hat.

Step 5. Your mode of operation. Most people allow their mind to control their emotions and simply react to all the things that happen to them each day. By being aware of how your brain and your emotions work, you can control how you react to each situation you find yourself in.

Learn to Relax on Demand

Most people hardly ever relax - even when they’re asleep, they’re still tense and under stress. Our bodies operate and function best when we are relaxed. We can think more clearly, we feel better, and are much more fun to be around. So the first and most vital lesson is learning how to fully relax - and you’ll be amazed at how easy it is.

Sit in your chair with you back straight, and your feet flat on the floor. Make sure the base of your spine is pushed right back into the back of the chair.

1. Place you hand (whichever comes naturally) onto your stomach just about where your belt buckle is (or would be if you were wearing a belt).

2. Take a deep breath in and push out your stomach muscles allowing your lungs to start expanding into your stomach area - this helps fill your lungs from the bottom allowing you to get much more air into them. Continue to inhale filling the top of your lungs as well. When you can’t breathe in anymore, hold your breath for a slow count of 6.By holding your breath, you ensure your lungs can extract the maximum amount of oxygen from the air and get it into your bloodstream.

3. Now breathe out slowly for a count of 6 and suck in your stomach muscles as far as you can at the same time. This helps expel the maximum amount of air from your lungs ready for the next deep breath in. Once you have exhaled, hold your breathe for another slow count of 6.

4. Repeat this breathing technique for a total of 6 to 12 times.

The process we are following is: Push out your stomach and breathe in - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - 6; Hold your breath - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - 6; Suck in your stomach and breathe out - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - 6; Hold your breath - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - 6; Repeat the complete process 6 - 12 times.

You may start to feel a bit dizzy or light headed while your doing this, or once you’ve finished. Don’t worry as it’s completely natural - just sit still for a few seconds and the feeling will pass. The reason is that you are now very relaxed and your blood is very well oxygenated. The light headedness is due to the increased amount of oxygen getting to your brain (which is a good thing).

Now that you’re calm and relaxed you can move on to the rest of the program - I haven’t got space to fit everything in here so there’s a free download you can get over at http://magic-hats.com with the rest of the steps. You can download it and have completed the first task within the next 10 minutes, and be on your way to a happier, more positive and much more successful life.

Author Wendy Jones is a personal development, NLP and life coach. Here she explains some personal development using some simple yet highly effective personal development techniques using the Magic Hats program from a highly respected master NLP practitioner.

Take Action Immediately

By Melisa Milonas

I have noticed one of the best ways to boost self-confidence is to act immediately. When you want to do something but you have a fear about it you will usually avoid and resist doing it. But when you choose to act in the moment in spite that your fear, you experience power and boost in self confidence.

When I am working with a client and they have an assignment or task to complete that is confronting to them I notice they always want to push it off doing it and put it toward the bottom of the list. And they put the easy things at the time of their priority list. So I always have to give them a little push and request that they do the scary thing first or soon. What happens when you put things off that you’re afraid of doing, they become scarier over time. It is harder and harder to get yourself to do it.

It is important to do the things that you fear first, right away when you are starting your day. This approach as you feel powerful and confident and everything else you do seems like a breeze. Also when you are asked to do things that scare you, it will be easy for you to say yes and because you will have the confidence to know you can do it.

If you know there is something you want to do that scares you, do not choose to wait two weeks to do it. If you do you are giving your mind the opportunity to focus on the fears. You will start to find excuses for putting it off even longer. That is how procrastination starts. So many women tell me that they think they are lazy because they procrastinate. I have to re-educate them that they are not lazy. The problem is they believe their fears and excuses are real. They don’t realize they are avoiding something that is confronting to them. Once they see that it is an irrational fear blocking them they choose to take action.

Have you notice when you have procrastinated, after you did what you were putting off you say things to yourself “it wasn’t that bad, “I don’t know what I was so worried about?” “That was easier than I thought.” Those thoughts are signs that you feared something and it was stopping you from acting. The fear may be as simple as you feared it would take long, or the task would overwhelm you.

The next time you want to do something that is scary or confronting to you act immediately with out thinking about it. Even if you have some thoughts or fears that come up, accept them and say do it anyway. If you do it right away you will instantly feel confident. Surrender to not knowing everything or having enough time and do it, its ok, you will figure it out as you go. When you have this approach everything usually feels less threatening and more enjoyable.

I can not stress enough how important it is to act immediately, this is one of the best ways to boost yourself self-confidence. When you practice this you will become more decisive and know how to respond quickly to any situation. You unwavering trust about yourself.

Your assignment:

The next time you want to do something that you have fear do it right away. Do not let your mind talk you out of it. Look at the last two weeks and identify where you have put off doing something. See what excuses you have come up for not doing it. Ask yourself is it possible that this excuse came from a fear I have? Is that feat real or valid? Also ask yourself, If I did not have this fear would I have done it already? Then take care of it immediately.

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